Friday, November 5, 2010

The Sarcasm of Paul

Did the word of God originate from you?

I am sure that most of you, dear readers, are familiar with the ages-old debate in the Christian church over women in the church. Can they speak? Be ministers? Hold positions of authority over a mixed congregation?

It could seem as if there isn't an simple answer. I hold that there is a simple one and it's been right where we would least expect it! But prepare yourself, because this post and this topic requires logic and reasoning. Reader beware!

Let's start off with some good, old-fashioned Pauline epistle. How about Corinthians? I love me some good Corinthians. Nothing like a Snuggie and Paul's first epistle of the church in Corinth to complete the FOREVER ALONE
expectations I have for my life. But I digress.

In this letter, Paul is dealing with some upset in the church. In the chapter I'm about to discuss, Paul tries to set some grounds for orderly worship. I, for one, love nothing better than a worshipful brouhaha but evidently the Holy Spirit doesn't work that way. Too bad God doesn't work the way I want God to. That sounds like another post, though.

Chapter 14:26 starts off the section. Paul tells the Corinthians that it could be that everyone has something to add to the worship experience- rock on! However, those contributions need to be added in orderly, respectfully, and most of all, worshipfully. I think that from time to time, we as Christians forget just how worshipful peace and respect can be. I'm glad that Paul brought this up- the sovereignty of God strikes again! (Perhaps "strikes" wasn't such a great word choice.)

But then we get to a troubling passage at verse 33b and following
(As in all the churches of the saints, 34women should be silent in the churches. For they are not permitted to speak, but should be subordinate, as the law also says. 35If there is anything they desire to know, let them ask their husbands at home. For it is shameful for a woman to speak in church.* 36Or did the word of God originate with you? Or are you the only ones it has reached?)

What is this? Does Paul, who believes that God doesn't care what sex we are, really believe this? What is he saying?

The answer to this is quite simple, but I wouldn't expect your armchair theologian to know it. Why? Because it's all in the Greek pronouns! Of course! (Done in my best Mr. Portokalos from My Big Fat Greek Wedding impression)

Let me paste in the Greek text for verse 36.
ἢ ἀφ’ ὑμῶν ὁ λόγος τοῦ θεοῦ ἐξῆλθεν, ἢ εἰς ὑμᾶς μόνους κατήντησεν;
with a literal English translation being "Or did the word of God come out from you(male, plural) ? Or came it only unto you (male, plural) ?
See those plural male pronouns in there? Oh, Paul! You slay me! Your sarcasm knows no bounds.

What is Paul getting at?
Paul is asking the men of the congregation if God's word came only to them, or if comes only from them. Now, Paul could have said this a number of other ways to avoid a gender distinction, but he said it in this particular way. Why? Because Paul wants to make certain that the Corinthians understand that although the women of this church are causing a problem right now (most of it related to Docetism if I'm not getting my history too flubbed), women can hold positions of ecclesiastical authority just as men can, and can speak in a church just as the men can.

The moral of the story is this: Paul is trying to disciple the church in Corinth while reminding them that all Christians- male or female- can hold positions of authority if God ordains them to hold it. Context is absolutely crucial to the formation of doctrine, as is taking the Bible as a whole.

Did God's word originate from only you?

Use Scripture in Context!

An exegetical how-not-to.

"So Judas threw the money into the temple and left. Then he went away and hanged himself." Jesus said, "Go forth, and do likewise."

Dripping with sarcasm,

Thursday, November 4, 2010

I haven't neglected you, dear blog!

I have been overwhelmed lately!

I am behind in my classes (but I'm getting back on track, thank God!)

Also, I have had a tough time on the family front lately. My paternal grandfather passed away a few weeks ago and I'm a very slow griever. I get really tired and lazy when I grieve, which explains my terrible work ethic. However I'm seeing the light at the end of the tunnel, so I hope to be able to invest some time in this blog again, soon!

Upcoming post:
The Sarcasm of Paul: "Did the word of God originate from you?"

In everlasting arms,

Saturday, August 21, 2010


Do I want to go to campus worship and support my comrades or do I want to go back to the liturgy that centers my day, my week, my life?

I can't express how vital the church experience is to me. The routine isn't the only thing, although my fellow liturgical buddies can attest to its comfort.

No, it's the spiritual experience. I need it, I thrive on it. And any religious person should be able to identify with this. It's more than just my personal enrichment, too. We pray for the glorification of God. We pray for our leaders, religious and those on earth. And we pray for the people of this world.

Then there's always communion. A mystery that I can't even being to explain. But it's a mystery that I need, desperately.

Knowing how much faith and religious experience has helped me and shaped me as a person, I can't help but wonder what it's like not to grow up religious. What is it like to have a nonreligious family? If you grew up in a family that wasn't religious, what was it like? Do you feel like you missed out on anything?

I feel that I would. I'm so grateful that I've never had to go a day of my life knowing that nothing I do could ever separate me from the love and grace of God.

Leave me a comment and tell me what you think. You're welcome to do so anonymously!

Peace be with you,

Monday, July 26, 2010

I have been struggling for a while.

I've been dealing with my chronic pain disorder for a few years now and never figured out how to use my faith to help me through it. All I could seem to do would be to fuss at God- get mad, get angry, cry tears of frustration that I was so helpless and hopeless at times. Which is fine, because God can take my anger. God's big enough for that.
Side note: It's astounding how much my pain disorder controls my life.

Today I finally got it.

I am fearfully and wonderfully made. I was deliberately created, specially, uniquely, just the way that I am. My legs were crooked for a reason. I had to learn to walk with a brace for a reason. I don't know what that reason is, but I'm unique and God knows that.

Maybe I'm meant to be that one girl who'll go out on a limb and test a wonder drug. Maybe I'm the only one who will be honest enough about my struggles to get some attention to worldwide sufferers of pain disorders.

Maybe I have something to learn from my pain disorder.

Am I supposed to rejoice in the fact that some days it takes strength that is honestly not my own to get out of bed? I don't think so. I don't know if God wants me to be joyful about this- certainly God doesn't think I'm wrong for getting pissy every now and then.

But I finally get it. I'm unique. I'm special. This is how I see life. Everything down to my very anatomy- my very nerve endings- my brain cells- is different with me. I am a unique human.

That's a good feeling. God knows that I'm miserable sometimes, and it's not what God desired to see me hurt, but God knows that I do. God is holding my hand through all of this as I grow.

And I'm thankful.

Uniquely yours,

Friday, July 16, 2010


Do you know what it's like to be chronically ill?
My case is a pain disorder. It's one of those things that I know that I'm sick, and I feel myself in constant pain and can't control it, but the doctors haven't given me a definitive answer yet. That is painful emotionally because I feel invalidated, but I should let that bother. You know that you have a cold even if you don't go to Doctor's Care. I know that I have a chronic pain disorder but I just don't know which one yet.

Having said that, my day-to-day existence is different from that of people who aren't sick.

I would post the following story in full, but I want to be respectful to the author's copyright. Please click this link and read about the Spoon Theory. It explains what day-to-day life is like for someone who doesn't "look sick".
I'm having a bad evening with my pain disorder and want you all to know what it's like for me. From now on, when I refer to "running out of spoons", you all will know what I'm talking about.


Monday, July 5, 2010

What do you want to read about?

Let's face it.
I'm working full time this summer and I don't have a lot of hilarious stories.
I don't have a lot of rant about and I'm not making any large leaps on a personal level that are blog-worthy.

So tell me what you want to hear! What do I think about this? Opinion on that? Tell you about a member of my family or more about my autistic deformed cat.
You know you want to.


Tuesday, June 8, 2010

Hoping to

Get some decent sleep tonight.

Last night, my cat decided that she wanted to sleep inside. Then she wanted to sleep with me- fine. Then she wanted to sleep ON-FRIGGIN'-TOP OF ME. Kitties make you hot, y'all. It is not cool in my neck of the woods this time of year. So this was not exactly a welcome experience.

I didn't mind too much, I just figured if it's a step in good bonding and if she doesn't give me all sorts of nasty fleas I'd be fine with it. I mean, I was sleeping on my tummy and she was lying on my back so I wasn't breathing in her kitty-ness. Which would have been rank because that child needs to brush her TEEF.

So I go to sleep with my 8-toed-mentally-retarded cat.

Then I wake up in the middle of the night because she started crying and either chasing a squeaking mouse or playing with plastic spoons and making them squeak. Either way, it was OBNOXIOUS because I was trying to SLEEP.

Normally, even at the moment, I would think her behavior was just fine. Shame on me for leaving the spoons on the floor. But at 3 AM... I was annoyed.

So I'm going to go to bed soon and hope that my kitty either doesn't find a mouse to chase and warble out, or that she just lies down with me and stays put. I put the spoons away- lesson learned.

Grace and peace (AND SLEEP),

Sunday, May 23, 2010

What is Pentecost?

Pentecost is big celebration in the Christian community. At least it should be!

This holiday is based on the Jewish harvest festival of Shavuot, which celebrated the Ten Commandments coming down from Mount Sinai 50 days after the Exodus. 50 days, thus "Pent"... eh?

In the Christian tradition, it's the celebration of the descent of the Holy Spirit. The Holy Spirit came at the conclusion of that same Jewish Festival, just after the Ascension of the Lord Jesus Christ. In the Christian tradition, the feast falls 50 days after Easter (aha! "pente" again!).

Pentecost is hailed as the birth of the Church. The gifts of the Holy Spirit enabled the apostles to begin their ministry and expand the Church on earth; to spread the Gospel of our Lord.

Happy Pentecost!
Thank you, God, for the Holy Spirit!

Friday, May 21, 2010

60th post!

Oh yes!

I've been busy lately crocheting a baby afghan for a friend. I kind of like the pattern, it's simple- but I'm using a delicate yarn and a bigger hook (size K) so it's very hole-y. That's actually a good thing in a baby blanket, because the baby can't suffocate. Science supports my granny habits. You heard it here first.

I just got back from attempting to give my most recent project companion animal, Delilah (a super-polydactyl cat) a bath.
I say attempting. Because it didn't work out.
She was just too afraid of the water, but my precious baby was so sweet about it! She desparately tried to get out of the tub, but she didn't scratch or claw me, she just wanted OUT!
I gave it two tries, but in the end I couldn't hold her down to bathe her and I really didn't have the heart to make her so worried. Even though her skin really needs a bath- she's got a lot of scabs from her flea bites. So now Delilah is probably a little angry with me, but she's still chilling in the yard so she's not that mad. I just wish I could soothe her skin without a bath! Dad suggested a dip, so I'll look into that.

You can't give Delilah a bath if she doesn't want one. She's from the 'hood. Not kidding.

I tried to give our old rescue/out-of-the-'hood cat, Morpheus, a bath back when he was with us. I took him on the back porch, got a wet towel, and rubbed him down. He was STANKY, y'all, so this was more than necessary. I think I got some Mane and Tail on the towel, and then rinsed him off with another one. I had to have Mom (AKA "Muhhh-ther") to help me, but he got a little clean.

All I succeeded in today was to see how very many toes Delilah has, rinse them, and possibly piss her off.
Utter failure.

Grace and peace (and flea bath),

Sunday, May 16, 2010

Hello, Summer!

It's summer. I'm busy.
Normally I just sit on my tush all summer, but this summer I have a Real Job.
Thankfully, it also comes with a Real Paycheck. Thank you, Jesus!

Speaking of Jesus, I need to read my Bible more often. Who wants to get on my tail about this? I am going to try to be proactive about it and set a daily time to be with God and only God. I talk to God all day, but I need to set apart some time just to spend reading my Bible and "be still and know that I am God".

Which brings me to a point. I feel really uncomfortable and strange just talking to God. Just saying what's on my mind. I think that God knows what I'm saying all the time- there isn't a time when I imagine that God isn't privy to what I think, say or do. So I feel weird JUST praying. It also is an incredibly intimate thing, to talk to the creator of the universe. It's a privilege that isn't lost on me.

Does anyone else feel this way? That praying, just praying, feels a little strange?

Grace and peace,

P.S. Next Sunday is Pentecost. Woot!

Thursday, April 1, 2010

What is Maundy Thursday?

Also known as Covenant Thursday, this is the celebration of the Last Supper and the institution of the Holy Eucharist by Jesus Christ.

Here's the Bible Story:
And he took bread, gave thanks and broke it, and gave it to them, saying, "This is my body given for you; do this in remembrance of me."

In the same way, after the supper he took the cup, saying, "This cup is the new covenant in my blood, which is poured out for you.

While they were eating, Jesus took bread, gave thanks and broke it, and gave it to his disciples, saying, "Take and eat; this is my body."

Then he took the cup, gave thanks and offered it to them, saying, "Drink from it, all of you. This is my blood of the covenant, which is poured out for many for the forgiveness of sins.

While they were eating, Jesus took bread, gave thanks and broke it, and gave it to his disciples, saying, "Take it; this is my body."

Then he took the cup, gave thanks and offered it to them, and they all drank from it.

"This is my blood of the covenant, which is poured out for many," he said to them.

Maundy Thursday is often celebrated with a foot washing service or a stations of the cross service. If a church wishes to have a Good Friday service with Holy Communion, then the Sacrament to be used for that service must be consecrated now. In other words, on Good Friday reserve Sacrament must be used, and this service is a good opportunity to make consecrate it.

Maundy Thursday grace and peace,

EDITED TO ADD: I realized at church on Thursday that I have been gravely remiss in this post, and have left out an important part of the Maundy Thursday service.
What I have left out is related to the foot washing ceremony.

Here is the Gospel story that I originally omitted:

FROM JOHN 13:1-17
It was just before the Passover Feast. Jesus knew that the time had come for him to leave this world and go to the Father. Having loved his own who were in the world, he now showed them the full extent of his love.

The evening meal was being served, and the devil had already prompted Judas Iscariot, son of Simon, to betray Jesus. Jesus knew that the Father had put all things under his power, and that he had come from God and was returning to God; so he got up from the meal, took off his outer clothing, and wrapped a towel around his waist. After that, he poured water into a basin and began to wash his disciples' feet, drying them with the towel that was wrapped around him.

He came to Simon Peter, who said to him, "Lord, are you going to wash my feet?"

Jesus replied, "You do not realize now what I am doing, but later you will understand."

"No," said Peter, "you shall never wash my feet."
Jesus answered, "Unless I wash you, you have no part with me."

"Then, Lord," Simon Peter replied, "not just my feet but my hands and my head as well!"

Jesus answered, "A person who has had a bath needs only to wash his feet; his whole body is clean. And you are clean, though not every one of you." For he knew who was going to betray him, and that was why he said not every one was clean.

When he had finished washing their feet, he put on his clothes and returned to his place. "Do you understand what I have done for you?" he asked them. "You call me 'Teacher' and 'Lord,' and rightly so, for that is what I am. Now that I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also should wash one another's feet. I have set you an example that you should do as I have done for you. I tell you the truth, no servant is greater than his master, nor is a messenger greater than the one who sent him. Now that you know these things, you will be blessed if you do them."

This is where the custom of foot washing comes from. The reason we do this in Jesus' example is so that we can learn to wash one another's feet as Jesus did. To serve others, to love others, just as Jesus set the example.
What have you, or I, done lately that has been "foot washing" for us? What have we done to love others or serve others selflessly as Jesus has? If nothing comes to mind, think about loving or serving someone in the example of Jesus. You'll be glad that you did!

NOTE: All scripture is from the NIV (Copyright Zondervan, via

Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Plans for the future

are uncertain for me.
There are a few things that I know:
-I will graduate from college
-I will eventually go into ordained ministry
-I will eventually go to seminary and become ordained

I just don't know HOW to do those last two. I'm so conflicted about in which denomination I'm called to serve and the timeline for going to seminary. Do I go directly after college? Do I wait a few years? If I decide to go into ministry somewhere other than PC USA, I'd need to take some time to attend that church, join and be confirmed. (Or do I?)

Which asks a related question, what do I do with myself between college and seminary? I'll have a degree in Religion with a minor in music and probably history as well. Would I teach? Will a school even hire me? (Save Christian schools) Do I go into youth ministry for a while to get on my feet? That seems the most reasonable option, I can get acquainted with the church and its procedure and still fulfill my calling. Maybe it's not even necessary to be a confirmed member in the denomination before you attend their seminary and seek ordination.

This whole post left out the ENTIRE "marriage" question. I find that interesting, for so long I always assumed that I would just get married soon after college and would figure things out then, but now I'm wondering about that. I haven't met anyone that I am interesting in marrying, and I am definitely not going to settle. I don't want to get married old because I'd like to have children, but ultimately it's all in God's hands when I find that special one and the circumstances thereof.

Holy Week grace and peace,

Thursday, March 25, 2010

Still alive

But barely! Greek test tomorrow is going to melt my brain. It will be fantastic. I stayed up late "studying" but I'm really just on facebook the whole time because I can't concentrate worth beans. I know, cue terrible person sob story here.
Anyway, sorry for neglecting the blog. School has been busy like WOAH and as soon as I get a chance to breathe, I will update you all on what's going on with me. =)

Grace and peace (Greek for peace is χαρα btw),

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

I can haz JOB!

That's right, internet. Brookie officially has a summer job.
This is either the end of the world or the dawning of a new, beautiful era. Let's go with the latter- I could use some good times!

Thanks everyone for your support, I can't wait to be a working woman. I know, shocked are we? I think that it will be an empowering and rewarding experience for me, and I hope that I'm able to do something good in someone's life through my job.

Lenten grace and peace,

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Well, here's a change...

A real post!

Actually, it's only a real post to those of you who aren't my friends on livejournal. I post there to keep my entries private (well, mostly private, since no one from LJ really reads my blog unless I tell them to and no one from my blog reads my LJ because they aren't my LJ friend. So there.)

I'm going to edit and then copy and paste the post in. It's pretty much the lowdown on Brookie, and if you've been a longtime reader you'll notice how much I've changed since going to college.



Evidently my church is one of the most liberal out there. Woo? I mean, liberalism has been a long time coming for me. I'm very fundamental on some things but really liberal on other stances. I guess that I'm okay being PC USA because, in all honesty, it's something to stand behind. I can disagree with things that I have reason to disagree on but when something comes up and I don't really know what to think about it, I trust my denomination enough to just fall back on them. See next section:

My church is fine with gays. Individual churches may have their own opinions, but my denomination doesn't see homosexuality as a sinful sexual identity. I mean, there's scads of theological research on both sides of the story. I've read it all. I've believed it all at one point or another. At this point, I'm kind of wobbly on where I stand but I'm essentially of the mindset that God doesn't care who you love. I go back to the "well heterosexual relationships biologically produce offspring so wasn't that God's design?" a lot, but when I think about how overpopulated we are... I am beginning to think that homosexuality could even be a blessing from God. Stop reproducing kids that you'll just screw up anyway, and if you're well-balanced enough to want a child and care for one and biologically don't make one with your partner and don't want to do artificial insemination, then adopt a child who needs a home! Care for the orphans, I seem to remember that being something that Jesus lauded. Anyway, at this point in time I can't say what I think on the gays... but it's not like they're hurting anybody. Live and let live, and if you want to get a gay partnership blessed, when I'm ordained I can do so. Woot?

And I don't mean Valentine's day. I'm talking about the Eve Ensler Vagina Day- empowering women, ending the silence, trying to end the violence toward women. My campus just had our own offshoot of the V-Day movement and it was empowering, liberating, and rewarding. For girls who have been victimized it was like a week of "Yes, this happens. It happened to me. Let's end it now" mixed with "I am FREE". I was so pumped that we have a V-Day movement here on campus and can't wait to get involved with it next year.

Has no gender. I wish that people could wrap their minds around this. God doesn't have a gender, doesn't have a sex, IS NOT A MAN. OKAY? Using "He".... whatever. Don't make a habit of it. It perturbs me slightly and if I'm cranky it can totally set me off (blame it on the Presbyterianism). But then I see this downright patriarchal theology and I want to scream. God doesn't care if I'm a man or a woman. God loves me for me. Nothing I can do will change that in any way. This is also why I'm pretty okay with the gays- there is no male or female in Christ... why do I care if sexless individual A marries sexless individual B? I don't. But this whole God thing goes so much further. Women repress themselves when they think that God's MASTER PLAN for them is to raise good Christians and keep a clean home and make their husband's life easier et cetera, et cetera, ad nauseum. Child-rearing is a SHARED job. Whether the wife stays at home to care for them or the father, it doesn't matter. It's not just one person's job. Neither is better than the other based on pure genetics. Maybe the wife IS the better full-time caregiver and that's fine with me. But the husband might be, too. Or heck, the other wife might be too. Or the other husband. Or whatever. God hasn't generalized an entire sex because God doesn't care what sex you are. God can't set gender roles when God doesn't care what gender you are. God is portrayed as a father. God is also characterized as a mother. Deal with it and move on. And stop putting my God, the creator of the universe, into a box. How offensive that must be!


I am making them. I am also starting to puzzle them out, which is incredibly exciting. (insert rambling that I'm not including for the sake of anonymity).
Have you ever noticed that people can say a lot of honest things without ever actually saying anything?

Lenten grace and peace,

Thursday, February 18, 2010


I saw Emily's giveaway and thought- BLOG POST! I gave up makeup for Lent, so what better thing to do than let my readers win some products that I can't use? Of course I'm entering, too, and maybe after Lent I'll get to use the spoils should I win! Anyway, here's the link to Emily's blog, and I hope that you all are lucky!

Lenten grace and peace,

Wednesday, February 17, 2010


But I'm not doing it! It's my friend Melissa Peacock at and she's giving away the book Hear No Evil by Matthew Paul Turner. You know you want it! Follow the link to her blog and enter to win!

Want more info? Here's the book's blurb:
A collection of wise, compelling, and often uproariously funny essays built around the experience of music as a transformational element in a moment of truth, Hear No Evil mines Matthew Paul Turner’s humorous memories of his evangelical youth and invites readers to groove along on his journey.

From attending forbidden contemporary Christian concerts to moving to “Music City” Nashville, Hear No Evil chronicles Turner’s “life soundtrack” which morphs seamlessly into the stories of people, places, and experiences that have taught the music-editor-turned-author some new things about God, forced him out of his comfort zone, and introduced him to a fresh view of grace along the way.

If you’ve ever had the opening bars of a song transport you back in time or remind you of a pivotal spiritual moment, Matthew Paul Turner’s honest—and frequently hilarious—musings will strike a chord. Straight forward and amusing, Hear No Evil is an exploration of a life of faith lived to a personal soundtrack.

Lenten grace and peace,


I'm Presbyterian. This means that we don't generally "do" a lot about Lent. We leave it up to the individual. This individual chose to do something for Lent, and this is what I chose!

I'm adding serious prayer into my routine this Lenten season. It will hopefully mean less frivolous Facebook time and more time with God. Collegiate friends, did you all know that we have a prayer room in the campus center? That's where you'll find me!


Getting rid of MAKEUP. Shock. I know. This child is practically the international makeup spokesmodel. I've done everything but be dispatched to the UN. And I'm giving it up. Why?
I think that I view makeup as something that does more than just improve an already beautiful face or complexion. I hide behind it. I don't feel comfortable in my own skin without it. I found myself wearing makeup because I didn't fit in unless I did so.
It became my mask.

So for 40 days I will not wear it, and you, my friends, can hold me to it. Hopefully I'll learn a lesson about being myself for myself and become more comfortable in the skin that God gave me.

Lenten grace and peace,

I survived...

The plague.
Now, when most people think of the plague they think of the Black Death or smallpox. When you're in college, though, the plague is that crazy illness that is running rampant through campus and will debilitate you should you catch it.
Drat my hand-eye coordination; I caught it!
After laying in bed all day wishing for something other than consciousness, I finally got over the 24 hour bug and was able to live my life once more. Hopefully I have an immunity to it now and will be able to avoid it from now on... but one can only hope!
How about you, dear readers? Have you gotten the plague, or narrowly avoided it?
Best wishes go out to all of you- stay in good health!
Grace and peace,

Monday, February 8, 2010

Summer Work

I have a few options for a J-O-B this summer. I'm a little freaked out because I've never had a legit, tax-deducting job before, but I need to grow up and get one. Since my call is to ministry, I have found to places willing to accept my application (although they haven't promised to hire me):
1. My home church (Presbyterian) as a youth intern to either high school or middle school
2. A summer camp that has to locations, one close to home and one several hours away.

I am applying to both. There's a very real possibility that I might work at both, since the internship at the church would only be 10 weeks, so I could spend the rest of the summer working at the camp. I have never worked at a camp before but I have been to camps before- does that count? haha.

Luckily I do have experience being a youth intern. I was an unpaid intern at my old youth group for a semester and did everything from busywork for the youth pastor to "Chaperoning" middle school trips and planning mission trips for them. That was one of those stressful but so awesome things (the planning part). It was a mix of "this is a TON of responsibility" to "I have the opportunity to make this awesome for a group of kids".

So let's hope that the application process and, hopefully, the hiring process goes well. Or we can hope AND pray. That would be super cool.

Grace and peace,

Sunday, February 7, 2010

A Clean Dorm Room

Is a happy one. I cleaned, dusted, did all of my laundry, vacuumed and am changing the air. A clean room just feels good!

Now let's see if I can get my cosmological argument paper written. Samuel Clarke, your logic is over my head and yet, I must write about it.
Remind me what I thought that this class wouldn't be so difficult?

Grace and peace,

P.S. The pastor of the Presbyterian church that I'm an affiliate member of in my college town said I should be a liturgist one Sunday. BALLIN'!

Sunday, January 31, 2010

Livebogging the 2010 Grammy Awards!

This started out as a facebook status series but got out of hand. Here we go!

Lady Gaga AND Elton John are performing together right now on the Grammy Awards! I love them both, this is too cool!


"You know who I would like to see perform together? Adam Lambert and Any Sense of Self Restraint!" -Stephen Colbert

Happy now, Kanye?

Jennifer Lopez, it's nice to finally see you wearing REAL clothing.. and not rolling around on stage. I believe you've found your new niche!

Is Green Day performing with Scary Spice?

WTF, Beyonce? Crotch grabbing while wearing a leather bustier with a flared skirt, singing "If I Were a Boy?" Give "If I only Had a Brain" a try.

Don't even start singing Alanis Morissette, Beyonce. Do you have any idea what that song is about?

I get it. You'll mess up the lyrics, writhe around on the floor and then sing about how badly you've been treated by a man. It's hard to empathize with you right now. I mean, if you stopped marketing yourself as sex on a stick I'm sure the boys wouldn't treat you like a toy. Just sayin'.

Anyone else think that Pink was Princess Leia for a second?


I need another commercial break soon. I gotta go.

Congrats, Zak Brown Band for best new artist!

Fergie-Ferg brings back the visor! Oh yes.

I've got a feeling that this song has been played at every frat party in the civilized world since its release.

That said, it still gets me pumped and ready to party! Mazel tov!

Hey, Will I Am, you are flat without an autotuner. Sorry, man. I know it's a tough knock, but learn from Kanye!

Lady Antebellum

It's a quarter after one, I'm a little drunk and I need you now.
As the habitual designated driver, I can't tell you how many times I've heard this over the phone.
Although I realize that the point of this song is not the same as my plight.

Stephen Colbert
on winning the internet release award
I guess I should thank Jesus Christ for having such a great birthday.
Yes, Stephen. Yes you should!

Starts out opera, then we see the Yeti's tame cousin conducting the band, and then the non-Yeti turns out to be T-Pain! What next, Jaime Foxx? I'm impressed!

, THERE's EVEN MORE! Re-re-re-re-REMIX! that more curvy lady supposed to be on the stage? That confused me.

Justin Beiber and Ke$ha... he's about a foot shorter and an octave higher than her, and that's unsettling coming from a boy who is trying to going to "tell you one time" that he'll make me "one less lonely girl".

Love me some TaySwift!

Taylor and Stevie Nicks are performing "Rhiannon"- amazing!

Did Lionel Richie seriously just tell me to don my 3-D glasses? I feel like I'm in Cinema 9 about to view the Pixar movie UP.

What about all of the energy you're wasting with these stage lights? Or the carbon footprint of this award show with the private jets, cars, and fan traffic? I bet that y'all didn't carpool on the way here.

Prince and Paris Jackson appear and give us a touching speach about their father. Let me interrupt with my rudeness and say THERE ARE NO MASKS OR SCARVES OVER THEIR FACES and WE'RE ACTUALLY HEARING THEM SPEAK. This is such a shock. But congrats, children of Micheal, because you handled it well. I know it must have been hard so soon as after your father's passing.

...we know that Michael had vitiligo, but he was still black. These children don't look mixed-race at all. Am I seriously misunderstanding their genetic heritage or am I the only one confused?

Nice choice, viewers! "Livin' On a Prayer" is just about everyone's theme song right now (not to mention a classic!) Brought to you by Bon Jovi and Jennifer Nettles

Was Lady Gaga Rhianna's stylist for the evening?

This is a beautiful song and a beautiful duet by Mary J. Blige and Andrea Bocelli!


Don't steal music. Got it.
Hey, how much of that money actually goes to the artist, buddy?

Dave Matthews Band! Yeah!

Gah, I'm getting tired and hungry, y'all.

Glad that Beyonce got the vocalist award of Katy Perry. Katy can sing, but doesn't. Happy, Kanye?



Apparently, Beyonce and Jay-Z have been married for around 2 years.
Brookie obviously doesn't follow celebrity news much!

It's time for this blogger to go to bed and end the liveblog, and just in time! I think that the Grammy Awards are just finishing up.

Grace and peace,

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

It's beautiful

Today was the first time that I ever cried after a baby was born. With my niece, I was just excited that she was finally here. But with my friend A's baby, it was different. I was pumped that he was here, but more than that I was given a glimpse into what that family went through to finally hold their son. I knew that his arrival hadn't come without struggle and worry, and seeing him there was sweet blessed assurance. I didn't want to get my hopes up too high, but I had. Then I saw a picture of her holding her beautiful, precious, healthy son and I lost it. Tears poured down my face in the campus center as I praised God for such a beautiful creation. A smile lit up my face as I rejoiced with this family that they have this new bundle of joy to bring home. Now I'm full of awe, thinking about the awesome God that orchestrated the life of this child from the womb.
Psalm 139: 13-14
For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother's womb.

I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.

Please join me in the celebration of new life. We have a new brother on this earth! This family has a son!

Psalm 92:4
I sing for joy at the works of Your hands.

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

A Crazy Week

So, I have no idea where I am this week.

I feel like every second I'm so busy or inundated with new information that I can't process anything. I know that that means two things:

I need to start journaling again. This is different from blogging because my journal is for my eyes only. I can write whatever I need to and I don't have to hold myself back. Some things aren't appropriate to write in a blog, y'all know that. And blogging for catharsis isn't feasible all the time. "I'm feeling overwhelmed! Let me pull out my laptop and find a wireless connection..."

I need to CALM DOWN and SLEEP. Calming down involves me sitting in one place for a few hours with a good book. Sleep is just as you thought. I have to get a lot because my chronic pain problems wear me out. I think that I function best on 8-10 hours of sleep for a normal day. I have been getting closer to 6 lately. Ahh!

So, with that, I hope to have a better week next week! This week is probably down the drain. ALTHOUGH my whole foods diet has been great this week! My snacks have been whole trail mix (no chocolate or sugar or processed anything in it), my meals have been as close to whole as I can get in GDH and in Springs I get a spinach salad with grilled chicken (yum, people, YUM!) and I've been drinking water or hot tea. Of course I put a bucket of sugar in my tea, but I'm working on weaning myself! And I use Stevia from time to time when I sweeten my tea in my room.

So, that's a positive note to end on =]

Grace and peace,

Sunday, January 24, 2010

Winter Conference

I went to Montreat this past weekend with my college for our annual winter conference. Several professors attend with a large portion of the student body and we spend the weekend together in the beautiful mountains of Montreat, enjoying a Sabbath together. This conference was such a renewal for me. I'm really grateful for everyone who worked on the retreat, those who prepared for it for weeks before the event. I'm also thankful for everyone who went and made it such a great experience for me. I felt so loved and accepted, and I got to interact with members of the community that I normally don't see or get to be with. It was so refreshing to see my peers ignoring the social order or status quo and just existing as a single group, with a common purpose and love for one another.
You might say that I'm being too much of a hippie about this, but I think that I'm just genuinely surprised to see my peers be so... nice.

Thank you for that.

While I was on the retreat I felt a tug to "come back home"; to come back to the Presbyterian faith that I grew up with. For years I ran around to difference churches, looking at difference theologies, researching this and that until this weekend I realized that what I already believe is accomplished in the faith that my church family instilled in my so many years ago. I'm proud to be a member of my church and I know it. I know how Presbyterians do things. I know our rules, our laws, how to get a job with a Presbyterian church, what we believe and what we practice. 15 years of solid Presbyterianism has bred in my a fierce love of bagpipes, tartan, and Scotland. I love worship services that make less of the performer and celebrate the God who gave us the talent with which to worship. I love that we're held accountable to an association but not hierarchical enough with our rules and confessions that we allow heresies to sneak in and become cornerstone dogmas.
I'm so happy that my denomination, and I know some people hate denominations, accepts the fact that God made me a woman and equal to a man. I'm overjoyed that I'm not a second-class citizen. I feel accepted as a member of the body of Christ, regardless of my gender, and it's beautiful to me that I can serve in the full pastoral capacity to which I have been called.
More than this, it's home. Home isn't perfect, but nothing is perfect but Christ. Sure, there are controversies. Who hasn't had them? And the confessions of the Presbyterian church fully admit that human doctrine in this area can be subject to any number of errors (especially outside of historical context). But I won't waste my time addressing every criticism of my home church. Because it's just that; it's home. It's home, and that's enough for me.

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

I have not been liberated.

Last night at Hobbie Talk, we discussed women: how they were treated in the Bible, how they were and are treated by the Church, how society views women.
In this discourse, the subject of the Vagina Monologues came up. A group of students from the college are putting on the annual production of the collection of monologues celebrating the vagina (shock!) soon, and auditions are this week.
I am normally quite the prude. I always thought that I was very conservative, maybe just a little insecure. Now I realize it's because I've been trapped for most of my life, hiding secrets and shames and not telling anyone. This is one of the many things that the Vagina Monologues addresses.
I have finally realized that for years and years, I have allowed society and tradition to dictate some of my most fundamental beliefs. Like that God is a man. I'm not about to start referring to God as a chick, but why do I see God as this huge man with a beard hugging the earth? Why do I give God that masculine image? Why has it NEVER offended me? Why has it not hurt me that God, who is characterized as a mother NUMEROUS times in Scripture, has been constantly referred to as a male?
Why is it that it has never bothered me, and I have never questioned, that humans are referred to as "all men", rather than simply "all humans"? Don't tell me that it's because "all men" is shorter to write or say. History shows us that brevity wasn't favored by the great minds and writers of the past. Proof is in the mass of reading that I have to do for Philosophy, easily 100 pages on trying to use a logical equation to prove that God exists. It can be written in under 100 pages, peeps. Trust me.

Why is it that rape isn't always considered a violent crime? Why is it JUST a sex crime? Does everyone realize that the psychological mindset of the rapist isn't to have sex for pleasure but to overpower the victim? It's like calling assault a party foul. "But normally guys wrestle for fun. This one just got out of hand."

Sound ridiculous? I thought so.

So now that my religious sabbatical is over and me and Jesus and my vocation are tight and in a stable loving relationship, I'm going to liberate myself as a woman. I'm going to celebrate the fact that God made me a woman and all of the intricacies that go with womanhood. I'm in for a beautiful journey, and I encourage you to make it with me.

Monday, January 18, 2010

Insert quirky subject line.

Okay, so the "arthritis-fibromyalgia-carpal tunnel-diagnosis of the week" front is not going so well. But I'm dealing with it. I spent a whole day off of the computer and it didn't make a difference. Again. SAD.

As far as having a social life goes, it will be nonexistent this week and next. I'm behind on the reading for some of my classes (I know! Already! And we just had a break! blah blah blah) and next weekend being the weekend retreat (oh boy, I just hope that my professors put off all homework for Monday and Tuesday because of it. Dreaming on, I know)... I will be SWAMPED.
That's okay, because GIRL'S NIGHT IN made up for it. Sort of. Let's just say that the unmentionable account of girl's night is, of course, unmentionable on a blog. But all of you girls know what happened! Every girl's night follows a few general rules. Such as:
Games: truth or dare, never have I ever
Chick food: Brownies and cupcakes
Fru-fru drinks: Shirley Temples

And a whole lot of FUN. And SECRETS. And NICKNAMES. My nickname is Angel, a shock to most of you who call me the alky.

Also, it's like the rainy season on the Serengeti. And I must have left my rain boots at home. Silly me! I guess I'll be wearing my Sperry's a lot because they're made to "GET WET", after all!

The whole foods diet is going pretty well. I'm successfully avoiding high fructose corn syrup, food dies, and preservatives, despite the challenges of GDH (haha).

I also found out what I'm going to do with my life!!!!

But I'm going to make you wait for another post for me to explain it. CLIFFHANGER! NO! I guess you'll just have to follow my blog or add it to your blog reader to find out!

So now, I leave you with this math joke:
The Gaga Law (RAH)² (AH)³ + RO (MA + MAMA) + (GA)² + OOH(LA)² = Bad Romance

Friday, January 15, 2010

Lame day!

A few days ago, my pain issues in my hands starting flaring up. I am not exactly sure what caused it, but it is definitely here and I don't know what to do. Medication rarely works unless I take the hard core stuff, which I don't want to do in school. I could try to get a brace to keep me from moving my hand/wrist so much. I have gone without the computer for days (Shock, I know!) to see if it was the typing position bothering me, but no relent. Playing piano hurts, writing with a pen hurts, typing hurts, using my ergonomic mouse hurts, twiddling my thumbs hurts. It's like my wrist is hooked up to its personal electric chair.

What are your thoughts on pain management? Any ideas?

As for me, I'm going to mope. If you go to school with me, a hug and a smile will make me feel worlds better!

I have to say, there's a good in this situation. My legs aren't killing me right now and my winter shoes are providing enough support for them that my twisted bone structure isn't aching. In summer, I wear shoes that aren't so supportive. In winter, although it's colder and makes my joints stiffer, the constant ache of summer is going away. It's enough to make me consider wearing tennis shoes year-round!

God's peace,

Sunday, January 10, 2010

Rednecksington fun

When all other entertainment fails you, this town provides some excellent people-watching. Go into the Wal-Mart and browse around the isles for a while. Laugh at the mile-long line of cars at Chick-Fil-A. Marvel at the display of humanity that can be found at the flea markets. And if you're brave, valiant and have a prescription of Xanax, go the mall. Which is technically not in Rednecksingon, but I only had so much to work with.

Imagine yourself, assaulted on every side by body after body. You run past the Seacret kiosk so the foreign salespeople don't try to rope you into buying some $200 eye cream that you know won't do any more than the $6 Olay that you bought when you were in Wal-Mart. You pass Hollister and smell that acrid teenage perfume. You smell it because they literally pay a kid to walk around with a bottle of "Pure Secks" or whatever they market and spray it throughout the store nonstop.
You pass Auntie Anne's and try not to succumb to the sweet scent of dietary sin.
You take a bite of the pretzel that you swore that you wouldn't buy and debate the merits of walking through the beauty department at Belk.

You decide against it and continue on your journey. On the way, you walk into the fume cloud billowing from Abercrombie & Fitch and try not to stare and the huge poster of a half-naked man (with amazing muscle tone) in the entrance to the store. It's just the fumes, ladies. Take a deep breath across the walkway and you'll snap out of it. But not if you keep walking straight, because then you walk past the Yankee Candle. You smell a mix of caramel, potpourri and floral scents that kind of make you want to gag. That pretzel was a bad idea.

Summoning up your strength, you continue into the labyrinth of the Food Court. Dairy Queen, that Chinese place beside that Japanese place which faces the kind of but not really Chinese place which is next to the Subway. And a Chick-Fil-A, which could also be called Crack-Fil-A, because there's one across the street and another one in Rednecksington with a packed parking lot and a mile and a half long line at the drive-thru.

After looking through the Hot Topic windows just because you thought that your experience couldn't get crazy enough, you buy a shirt from the Big Thursday stand that says "COCKS" and nothing else.

Then go home to the "Best Town by a Dam" and pick up dinner at Lizard's Thicket. You deserve it!

Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Dear Mr. Pedicurist,

please stop making me feel so awkward. This whole barely-any-verbal-communication thing combined with your misunderstanding my loud and plain instructions creates a less than calming pedicure. That you charged me too much for. The sign said $25, dude. Plus a $12 manicure should come in to around $37 before tax. In my state, with tax that's right around $40. You charged me $42 and said you didn't include tip. UNTRUTHS! I tipped you anyway. But you made me feel awkward.

Sunday, January 3, 2010


Brookie got a account. Find me here and ask me a question! Oh boy!

Saturday, January 2, 2010

Why, hello 2010.

Just when I got used to writing "09" on the date, it's another new year and I have to train myself to write "10". But with this new ending comes those not-so-new promises that everyone makes and few live up to: New Year's Resolutions (With Unnecessary Noun Capitalization).

The past year I started noticing what was in the food that I was eating and how it affected my body and mind. Let's just say that sugar is not a recipe for a well thought out blog post. So this year my resolution is to seriously research foods and nutrition and figure out what exactly I'm eating, how it's metabolized, and with that knowledge, what changes I should make in my diet. And by "seriously" I mean that I now have something to procrastinate and wiki-hunt with.

I hope that this isn't going to be one of those resolutions that is never lived up to. I only have one body and this one set of original internal organs. I'd like for them to last me as long as possible, and in the best shape that they can be in. If I can be happy while doing it, it's a plus.

You all can expect a lot of posts on what I find out, not because y'all need the education but because I need the repository for the information. And I need my incredibly intelligent and loyal readers to correct me when I'm wrong!

(Random: It's 1:14 PM on January 2nd, 2010 and I just heard a firework go off. Thank you, Rednecksington.)

If you know a lot about a healthy diet and lifestyle, let me know! Comment and give me some direction. I know that baby steps are the best starting block- what baby steps can you recommend?

Grace and peace for the new year,